Biotest

The V-Diet & Toxic People

This is a good one. Last night my best friend told me that my “friends” at the gym told him to tell me to stop working out. I was like…R U Serious! I have been getting bigger. My shoulders are def bigger as well as my legs. But they just don’t understand that you have to get bigger to get smaller…hence bulking then cutting. I will admit I have some BF to lose, but damn…people are harsh! They see you succeed and they try to shoot you down. I guess I will see who is a true friend and who is not.

[quote]morrisP wrote:
This is a good one. Last night my best friend told me that my “friends” at the gym told him to tell me to stop working out. I was like…R U Serious! I have been getting bigger. My shoulders are def bigger as well as my legs. But they just don’t understand that you have to get bigger to get smaller…hence bulking then cutting. I will admit I have some BF to lose, but damn…people are harsh! They see you succeed and they try to shoot you down. I guess I will see who is a true friend and who is not.[/quote]

They’re just jealous 'cos you’re better than they are! I get this at the gym sometimes when I outlift the guys!

Does anyone else notice that the most negative people around you are the ones who are in the worst shape? Telling you that you don’t have the right body type or that you’ll never be able to maintain the body once you get it and the like? It’s so frustrating hearing that from my fat friends, Ive been in better shape than they are my entire life and know so much more than they do, but it still pisses me off hearing it.

[quote]Muscles297 wrote:
Does anyone else notice that the most negative people around you are the ones who are in the worst shape? Telling you that you don’t have the right body type or that you’ll never be able to maintain the body once you get it and the like? It’s so frustrating hearing that from my fat friends, Ive been in better shape than they are my entire life and know so much more than they do, but it still pisses me off hearing it.[/quote]

Yeah I’ve noticed this…not sure if its an issue of them just being ignorant or the fact that they can’t/don’t want to justify the discipline and sacrifice it takes to be in shape.

Maybe its a little bit of both…after all, they wouldn’t be in such bad shape if they cared about how they ate/trained or if they had the intestinal fortitude to live the “healthy” lifestyle.

This is an amazing thread, and great for anyone who is trying to reach a goal. Once you are more aware of the fact that people are really trying to ruin your diet, it becomes easier to ignore them, and stick to your plan.

[quote]Muscles297 wrote:
Does anyone else notice that the most negative people around you are the ones who are in the worst shape? Telling you that you don’t have the right body type or that you’ll never be able to maintain the body once you get it and the like?

It’s so frustrating hearing that from my fat friends, Ive been in better shape than they are my entire life and know so much more than they do, but it still pisses me off hearing it.[/quote]

Oh, yeah! My favorite is the person who loves to rub it in that I weigh 15 pounds more than she. Um, HELLO! I’m also seven inches taller!

When I was at my heaviest, I also got a lot of attitude in the gym, from those that were very fit. It didn’t matter that I was busting but trying to get fit. I was fat, and therefore a target.

[quote]firespinner93 wrote:

When I was at my heaviest, I also got a lot of attitude in the gym, from those that were very fit. It didn’t matter that I was busting but trying to get fit. I was fat, and therefore a target.[/quote]

This pisses me off. I’m the first to put the hurt on lazy, excuse-making, self-delusioned fat people, BUT, if they’re in the gym then they’re not in that category and need help, support, and encouragement.

My only guess, Firespinner93, is that those people have never been fat and don’t understand the struggle.

Interesting thread. It took me years to train myself to ignore toxic people…and still there are some toxic-fu Masters who still can get under my craw. My problem right now is with my mother. I’m in the 3rd week of my first V-Diet and it’s going great, but my mom is making things worse by the day. I don’t think my mom is toxic, but rather is a bit neurotic in the way that she truly views food as love and a way of taking care of someone. Every time I visit her she’s waving some freshly cooked but fat and carb laden goodie under my nose.

On one hand she does compliment me on my discipline and success so far, and doesn’t make any nasty comments or back-handed barbs disguised as compliments. But the idea that her making something tasty, and in turn the eater enjoying and complimenting her on the meal, is a deeply embedded in her personality and will never change. Heck, even when I leave my dogs with her when I’m overseas, I come back and even my dogs are fat!

I have to be around her because she is recovering from a serious malady and I’m the only person geographically close enough to make sure she’s OK every day, so I’m dealing with a pressure to eat on a daily basis. Drives me nuts because being disciplined with cravings is one thing, but pressure from a well-meaning parent is very hard to out-grow, especially when the caretaker dynamic is reversed and all one’s familial emotions are factored into a food temptation.

This is so true… it’s untrue. This is my 2nd V-Diet and ive heard it all!

I’m a 25 year old dude teaching at a public elementary school. My coworkers are all over 40yo women, overweight, angry at the world. sitting in the teachers lounge, trying to explain the vdiet, while these people are downing donuts and cream/sugared coffee. I am telling you, this is like a documentary of Chris’ toxic people thread.

“Is all that protein supposed to be good for you?”
“I think I saw Dr. Oz say to avoid too much protein, so I don’t think I’d feel safe.”
“I just couldn’t gag those down.”

Just about every comment was telling me why they couldn’t do the vdiet, while, ironically, I had never invited any of them to join.

Wow, this is about the only thing holding me back from starting on the V-Diet. My wife and traveling for work. The travel is rare enough that I can work around it, but my wife is not. She reads fat acceptance blogs and forces me to read books by these people. Books filled with research that says that you’re healthier fat than if you diet and fail over and over, and you will always fail. Toxic!

I started another thread on this on the site and I almost got divorced over it because she found it. I changed my username and have to visit T-Nation in secret. Wow, this is making her sound worse than she is, or maybe I’m just whipped and in denial.

Anyway, this essay is really making me want to pull the trigger, but I have a work trip starting 10/6. Hmm, maybe I can make it work.

@Jeffthemaximum

Oh, I so hear you! When I taught public HS I worked with some of the most toxic people I knew. In every sense of the word. The new-ish teachers (around my age) were still fresh and full of hope and a decent work ethic. But those that were just ‘doing time’ as I called them were some of the most negative people I had ever run across. Not just diet and exercise but people in general.

It was what made me leave K-12 and go to the University system.

@analogue

Perhaps it is your wife that is in denial. There is a difference between being athletically lean and average with moderate (but healthy amount) of fat and being truly fat. The difference between the moderate and the truly fat usually is dictated by other health problems. Maybe not in your 20’s or early 30’s but not too long afterward.

In the end, it will probably be your wife getting her ‘money’s worth’ out of your health insurance. Certainly not something most of us here strive for…

But honestly, those sites are for people who just don’t want to work and have found a convenient excuse as to why they shouldn’t.

@analogue - It’s an easy problem to solve. Your wife cares about you, so you should let her “fix” you. Us men are often too selfish, and we want to be the experts on fixing ourselves.

Just adopt some self-destructive and disruptive/inconvenient (to your wife) habits. Work is so stressful, life is so stressful, travel is so stressful – you “really wish someone could give you advice to feel better about yourself”. Then start complaining about complete nits in your physical appearance (ear lobes all wrong, never liked how knobby your knees are, throat not masculine enough) and start talking seriously about “investing in my self-esteem” by paying for completely experimental cosmetic surgeries available only from specific doctors out of state (or out of country is better).

When she finally talks some sense into you, she’ll be proud of herself for saving you from your obsessive dangers, and will brag to everyone about how she convinced you to adopt healthy eating and lifestyle habits as a result of the V-Diet.

(Do I win an award for worst advice ever? But hey, you never know… :-))

Yeah man, that’s a non-starter. Nice try though. :slight_smile: I think I just have to go for it and see what happens.

I would start tomorrow if week 4 didn’t fall on my trip. And, you know, possible divorce. I still might, even though I’m missing some ingredients. Bah, this sucks.

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