MG65-The First Step

You don’t have to see the whole staircase to take the first step- Martin Luther King

and that’s what today is…the first step on my staircase of 28 days.

I need something extreme to get me out of the rut I’ve been in.

Food is my addiction… I don’t want to down play drug or alcohol addictions (cause I had my days of being a weekend warrior with both) but we HAVE to eat food, we don’t HAVE to drink or do drugs.

My all time high was 215 lbs on a 5’6" frame, that was Jan 2002. Being one that can carry weight, not a sole had a clue I was that heavy. And I refused to ‘see’ it even thought I looked at it daily. I managed to control my addiction for a time, and with sensible eating, weight training and cardio I lost 80 pounds… and found I loved the iron… but still loved food… needless to say since that time I’ve been up, down, and everywhere in between! I’ve competed twice at amatuer bodybuilding shows… and the 2nd time in 06 walked away with two 2nd place trophies… but still wrestle with my demons/addictions.

In June 2009, I did 3 professional photo shoots at Jr Nationals I was rocking a 150 lbs and loving my physique… well September 2009 I moved from IL to SC, found myself unemployed for 4 months, then taking a job making less than 1/2 of what I was, but hey it was a job… but over this time from June 09 till now, I’ve gained 50 pounds, and being so dangerously close to that 200 mark again scares me… I’ve tried doing what I’ve done before, only to hang tight a day or so then faulter… so… i needed something extreme (yeah I have an all or nothing personality too) - a friend told me of this Vdiet so… here I am…

so while Day 1 ain’t ‘in the bag’ yet - so far its been ok,in fact I’ve not been hungry at all…I will say I have Flameout, Superfood and Leucine, but I had protein already I need to use up as well as thermogenics so I could not justify that add’l expense right now… will use up what I have first… and my dymatize and ON Casien protein a comparable by label…but hell the first day is always easy then isn’t it :o)

Looking forward to following your blog. Good luck!

[quote]MG65 wrote:
and that’s what today is…the first step on my staircase of 28 days.

I need something extreme to get me out of the rut I’ve been in.

Food is my addiction… I don’t want to down play drug or alcohol addictions (cause I had my days of being a weekend warrior with both) but we HAVE to eat food, we don’t HAVE to drink or do drugs.


I like the staircase quote. I am also a food addict (hopefully recovering :), it is addictive and it sucks. There were some days when I just “had to have” a starbucks, or pizza or whatever. It then continues to go on and on until one day you look in the mirror and say crap. At least we are here now and doing something about it.

I am glad to see you on here, you can do it and can’t wait to read about your journey. Have a wonderful day 1!

OMGosh its amazing how you can become so flipping mindless… how you can grow to not pay attention…what I’m floored by is how I’ve gone from someone who a little over a year ago, was so meticulous about her time in the gym, she had meals prepared in advance, nothing and I mean nothing was left to chance…

never was being in a meeting late, or stuck in traffic an excuse because I prepared in advance for situations… water and protien was always with me for those just in case times… I went to the gym at 4am because I refused to let a long crappy day be an excuse to not go at night… OMGosh where is that girl??? I want her back… NOW!

I did great all day… didn’t feel hungry at all… but then I got home and the mindlessness set in… I had Halloween candy in my mouth before I even realized it, before… UGH… it is not like I was craving it, not at all really it just feel into that mindless pattern of late… its like you step outside yourself or your in the here/now mind shuts down…

dunno how to explain it… maybe its like a drug addict or alcoholic that first begins (sometimes for the 1st or 10th time) to kick their habit… at first you have to be constantly, almost tirelessly, exhaustedly in every moment or you just can fall into old traps.

I can remember when I was initially 215, it ‘seemed’ like dropping 80 pounds was a breeze… i mean reality is I know it wasn’t… but it ‘seemed’ so easy… that ignorance of all the hard work its gonna take is bliss time in life… that time in life when you just knew losing that weight would make everything else ‘right’ in your life, job, money, marriage, life, family - and when you got there and all those other things were still the same… i guess now each time trying to take off what my addiction (food) has put on now ‘seems’ harder because I don’t have that ignorant bliss that the rest of life will be ‘fixed’ when I lose this weight again…

ok rambling - back on step one today… and honestly weather you fall from the first step or the 28th, that damn fall hurts just the same!

well I had a nice long post that is now gone… ugh…

No worries, just a small mis-step. Reset the counter and stay strong!

you can do it today, just think of today as day 1 and the start of your “staircase”. It is only 28 days and then you will have a kick ass start on your kick ass body!

Well I have yet to get my butt into a routine again with getting up and getting to the gym and/or out for walks… but I can either berate myself for that, or get over my all or nothing attitude and be pleased that I did stick to my shakes yesterday… in fact I think I missed one cause I just was not hungry…

Good news is, and logically I know its all water, emotionally seeing the scale move down makes me happy… but down 2.4…

and I resisted triple chocolate cheesecake AND homemade chocolate pudding pie at Bible study last night… thought bullet was dodged UNTIL… I got home from study and the S.O. had baked sugar cookies AND cupcakes… egads, can ya give a gal a break… seriously! but I touched not a one… and even this morning when I put them in a ziplock bag (do men put anything away???) I didn’t even lick the icing off my fingers… washed my hands and blended up my shake - then wished I could throw those damn things away…

Now my boss just dropped a HUGE bag of left over Halloween candy on my desk to put out in our waiting area… can’t catch a break, but gave co-worker permission to hit me over the head with something hard if she sees me with any of it in my mouth or hands!

WAY TO GO MG!!! Good job saying no to all that junk. It is so hard sometimes when we are constantly bombarded with things that are not good for us, but it does get a little easier as you go. Now I just don’t really even think about it because I am so curious as to how this journey will go for me, I keep on thinking how I have to take pics and post them on here. I just can’t cheat :slight_smile:

GOOD JOB AND KEEP STRONG!! As in the words of my big brother, DON’T EVER STOP!

down another 1.4 today… but the headaches have been wicked… nothing helps them… but so far today I didn’t wake up with the same one I went to bed with…

hoping the headaches are now at bay… course having to resist my favorite food last night was tough… He made pizza for dinner… HELLO???

will get the workout part of this down by next week… just been flailing around, which is stupid, I KNOW what to do in the gym… its draggin’ my arse outta bed at 4am to do it!

Good to hear the headaches are starting to go away. GREAT JOB on saying no to pizza, what was he thinking??? I love pizza, it is my weakness and can’t wait to try the yummy pizza recipes on the HSM posts.

truth is I can’t expect the rest of the household to change because I need and want to

Hey MG, how is it going? How did your first week go? Look forward to hearing from you!!

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